HOW TO HANDLE CONFRONTATIONS.

 I’ve definitely been the type of person to avoid confrontation but now, I approach it head on.In my experience when I don’t approach it, it usually ends up hurting me in the long run as i bottle my feelings, which ultimately come out sideways as passive aggressiveness.

Of course, confrontation can be uncomfortable at times but it doesn’t have to be scary. In fact, it can even be healthy when done right. I think a large reason people hate confrontation is because it typically ends up worsening the problem.

These are what you should do:

Stop assuming feelings: Never assume you know what someone is thinking or feeling.Ask them for clarity.

Never Shift blame: If someone is coming to you because they’re upset about something, they probably aren’t looking for you to shift blame onto another person or situation. They probably just want to have their feelings validated and discuss what might need to change in order to move forward.

Do not play dumb: This one,I particularly hate so much. Yes,it happened and you know it did. Have you ever tried to talk to someone and they claimed complete amnesia?

Yeah, it’s never fun when someone starts playing dumb or denying or even better tries to flip the script and make it seem like you’re the crazy one.

Don’t say“I have no idea what you are talking about. That never happened. I didn’t do that.” Rather,

Do: “I can’t remember what you are talking about exactly, but regardless, I am really sorry”

It’s so much easier when both people can acknowledge the problem and move on from there. If someone keeps denying a problem they’ll likely feel attacked and the other person is going to feel unheard and it’ doesn’t solve the wahala.

We are all people. We all say and do things pretty mindlessly at times without realizing how it will impact others, and if something you say or do offends someone, that’s okay.

But, you do have a responsibility to not cause further harm when something is brought to your attention. Rather than rationalizing your actions or words, take responsibility and ask how you can move forward.

If your response isn’t adding to the solution, then what’s the point of saying it?