THE THIRD WHEEL.

Google.com (post by jayjay)
A third wheel is the extra/spare tyre. The one that follows their friend to go and meet bae. Their duties usually involve keeping their friend company to and from the date. Giving advice during ‘bathroom breaks’. Spicing up the date (especially if it’s the first time the other two are meeting). They are a human shield if their friend can’t control their hormones. They also provide a perfect excuse for a getaway.
I’m sure you’ve experienced this at least once in your life (if you haven’t you must be an alien).

Here are some tips on being a good third wheel:



Thou shall not steal the spotlight: Your main duty is to make your friend look good. Be your awesome self, but tune it down a bit so your friend can shine like the star they are. Be friendly and attentive but not too friendly and attentive. The second date might end up being with you and  the other person.

Speak only when you’re spoken to:Your friend is obviously the main protagonist of this story. No matter how much you hate the other person, stfu and just observe. The only exceptions are when your friend drops hints, or give signs for you to be the hero.

Be on stealth mode: If you’re seating away from them, blend in. Be like the wallpaper or furniture.

Say no corner love: If you don’t want to be a godfather or godmother in 9 months, never let your friend go to a secluded place (especially females). If they don’t want you to listen in on their conversation, give them a little space. You know you will still hear the full,biased version. Moreover, it might be a setup or one of them could become violent and things won’t go down well.

Be the timer: Don’t rain on their parade, but you’re human too. So give your friend subtle hints after at least 30 minutes (depending on the situation). If they are not ready to leave in an hour or two (depending on prior agreements and arrangements) you can leave. It might ginger them to do the same.

Be prepared: There is a 99% chance you will be alone, so make sure you’re prepared. The third-wheel starter pack includes:

Phones, Tablets, iPods, Laptops
Earpiece/Headphones
Books (Novel or Textbook)
Extra cash (you might end up being the bailout king/queen).



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